A couple of weeks ago I helped staff a booth at a big-arse manufacturing trade show.
I learned why I’ve never worked in retail jobs dealing with the public and why I probably shouldn’t. Ever. There’s some raving fruit amongst the public and they all seemed to gravitate towards me. Maybe it’s my sunny disposition and pleasant face that attract nutters from miles away, or maybe they cling like barnacles to anyone who gives them more than a passing glance of eye contact. I don’t know, but it’s scary.
The funniest visitor was a chap who wanted some information on lightweight materials for a project he was working on.
“What are you building?” I asked (regretfully, with hindsight).
“A flying car. The materials need to be as light as possible.”
My brain seemed to split in two, with one half deciding it wanted to say, “You’re bloody kidding me,” and the other, polite, nutter-attracting half wanting to say, “Oh, really, that’s fascinating. Tell me more.”
I’d cracked the sads earlier at a co-worker earlier for coming in over the top of my enquiries and ‘stealing’ the possible leads, and he made the mistake of trying to steal Mr AirCar before listening to the conversation. This time I let him push in and I stepped back to watch the show.
Half an hour later, and after I’d been for a long walk and refreshment break, Mr AirCar was lamenting how the strict our government is with rules governing flying cars. Who’d a thunk it? Apparently you just don’t build one and take to the sky; there are other considerations such as licencing, road/airworthiness and not having mid-air collisions and killing the poor punters at ground level. As much as I think my taxes are wasted at times, I don’t mind a few dollars going towards development of flying car policy and regulation.
A long fifteen minutes later, and after I’d gone to another stand to steal a stress ball (I needed it by then), he’d spread his blueprints over the table. This man was hell-bent on putting his car in the air. I looked at the designs and couldn’t see the reason why the wings were going to be transported in a trailer behind the car — you press a button from the console and the wings will emerge so you can take to the skies. Goodness knows how you take off, land and control a moveable trailer behind the car — I am obviously ignorant of the laws of physics relating to flying cars.
I didn’t want to ask questions about the trailer in case I was dragged back into the conversation, so I stood back and dusted the booth while my co-worker tried to extricate himself from the man’s clutches. That, my friends, is payback for stealing my leads.
But feel free to shoot me down in flames (not literally) if flying cars come soon to a dealership near you.
Crank-o-meter: scared for the future